Happy New Year.

I am pathetic. 

I have no friends i just spent the new year celebrating with.

I sat at home and watched as a fire burned. 

12:00 rolled around, I didnt even notice. 

I am pathetic. 

and i am sad. 

Very sad. 

I now have one more resolution to make. Do not feel like this next year. 

I would like to take tonight to realize that all the stuff ive said and done that created this, were absolutly not worth it. 

Im in FUCKING high school and i am not out partying right now. 

I have failed. 

And right now the only hope i have is to simply change. 

I cant believe i feel like this. 

Moving Forward. Sort of.

Well today I did some things that are going to help me get ready again. 

I ordered Precision Nutrition and I am going to use it for my dietary needs. 

I also Meditated yesterday which really helped out with being stressed. 

Another thing i did today was I bench pressed 215 lbs. 5 months ago I could only bench 145. Imagine where i can be in 12 months. 

The principle of Hard Work in turn creates Success comes to mind. 

My favorite thing about the day though was something i heard Steve Jobs say, it went something like"Each morning I would look myself in the mirror and say 'Am i going to enjoy what i am going to do today?' If the answer is No enough days in a row. I need to change something."

Let the countdown begin

We have 4 days until i officially begin my journey. Im mentally preparing myself for it.

I will do this. 

I bought some superfoods to put into my diet, and some new techniques to relieve stress. 

I purchased Acai, the amazonian superfood, and Chia, the seed of the ancient Indian empires. 

I have began doing Heated Yoga, and hope to start doing 2-3 days a week of it. And i also have begun to using Breathing Meditation every morning and night to relax. 

I feel these things will truly help me. 

Commit To Win.

By the time this journey is over, i want to be a new man. 

I want something great to be about me. I want people to look at me and say wow. 

My new goal is to be the leader of my football team. I want to do everything i can to become the best football player and person i can be. I want my teammates to look me in the eyes and know that i would do anything to help them on or off the field. I want to feel the feeling of desire and drive for a certain goal. I want to be THE BEST PERSON I CAN BE.

Momento Mori

I just finished reading Craig Weller's post on his blog in Barefoot Fitness and came across a chart he made labeled "Momento Mori" which means 'one day you will die'.  He has a chart of boxes, 52 wide 80 boxes tall. Each box signifies a week of his life. And each week that passes he crosses it out. I think i am going to begin using this chart myself. I also just came across Precision Nutrition, which i plan on buying and using. It is a very nice program that i believe is dignified to be my nutritional source. Im very unhappy with myself as of right now, my body is fat, i have pimples everywhere, and i am having trouble concentrating on important things. I am in dyer need for a change. Let it be soon, because my true problems are nothing but ones that i have created for myself. 

Im in hell right now. I can stay here and get the shit kicked outta me, or i can fight back into the light. I can climb out of hell. Inch by Inch. 

Xmas

As of right now, I pretty much am dividing this little journey into two parts. January-July and August-December. 

January-July is going to be organization, and frying the fat off of my body. August-December will be my time to pack on pounds of muscle. Starting around January 5th im going to plan out my diet. I got a new laptop today for Xmas, and it should really help me keep up with this blog. 

Im Wasting My Time

Well I havnt done shit since school got out. 

Im moving backwards as of right now. Im thinking about making a system to measure positive/negative, like meals, workouts, classes, sleeping hours. etc. 

I am going out of town tommorow and Xmas day. Then I am going to start to put in my 100% effort to make sure I am going to reach all my goals. 

Starting January 1st, im going to take 3 photos of myself, EVERYDAY. Front, Back and Side. 

Well i am off, Merry Christmas to you and your family. 

Understanding where I am as of now.

Well, the truth hurts. So i'm gonna write it down and look at how bad it hurts. 

-Never really had a Girlfriend. Mostly because I am an asshole. 

-I've got about 2 good friends. One who plays World of Warcraft and is overly into his manhood. and the other who is 6'4, 285 pounds, and wouldn't hurt a fly. 

-I've got alot of people who used to be friends, that I have told to fuck off because they have pissed me off somewhere along the road. 

- Im living off of about 5-6 hours of sleep a night. 

-My house could be a great place to hang, its just not clean. and lacks fun things. 

-I don't spend much time with my family, which bugs my Father, and bugs me. Because he has given so much things to me. 

-Ive "played" a guitar for a year now. Which is Bullshit, I have learned about 5 chords and strummed a couple songs. 

-I play football and baseball. And to my standards, I dont commit myself at all to these except for what is required. 

-Im all talk. And Show. Never Actually Do. 

-Im a No man. 

-I am a dick. To just about everyone. I dont smile unless i need to. And if u aren't up to my standards, then too bad for you. 

Now that ive thrown that out there, I'd like to make some propositions. 

-Quit being an Asshole to people for the heck of it, how about being nice and cool to people for the heck of it.

-Make amends with some people who probably want me to go jump a bridge. 

-Say Yes, to just about everything. 

-Do something. 

-Sleep so much I feel like I dont leave my bed.

-Clean the damn house. And make it look amazing. 

-Practice guitar, hell maybe get lessons, and do something something fun. 

-Look myself in the eyes, Discover what truly makes me happy, and be happy. 

-Tell my parents i love them. Hug them. and make sure they know i mean it. 

That took alot for me to do. But hey, the truth is the truth. And i want something better. 

When you say no to life. You are not living.

Tonight I saw the movie Yes Man. And during the movie it occurred to me that i should try saying Yes more to things. I also realized the correlation between the book "Outliers" and Yes Man, You can only be successful in life if You allow the situation to present itself. You must have somewhat a blind faith in some decisions in life. So this journey is not just a journey for Success, it is now for Happiness also. Ive been known as a rather serious and mean guy, maybe because I am not allowing myself to be a fun guy. I am reading the book "Blink" right now by Malcolm Gladwell, and he speaks about the expressions of your face are in correlation with your attitude, mostly it is not under your control. So you may be painting that smile on your face everyday, but its not gonna make you any happier on the inside. That is your choice. Remember 'When you say no to life, you are not living' 

Are you willing to change yourself? Yes or No?

Last Day at HHS

Well today was my last day at Houston High. And I'm saying bye to people that have been with me for around 3 years, but i cant wait to begin going to my new high school next semester. I believe that when opportunities such as these present themselves, it would be ignorant not to accept this. Im going for something better. I've got people sad to see me go, glad to see me go, and the worst part is, there are more glad to see me go. I've got Christmas Break to get everything together, and get my life in order. And beginning Jan. 5 my schedule looks like this: 

Monday: School 7 am-3 Football 3-5:15

Tuesday: School 8 am-3 Heated Yoga-4:30-6 

Wednesday: Same As Monday

Thursday: Same as Tuesday 

Friday: Same as Monday.

Saturday: 10-12 Morning Workout 4-6 Afternoon Workout. 

Sunday: Rest day 

About Me and Why I am Doing this.

My name is Jake Owens. I am 5'10 and 175 lbs. I am making an attempt to change my lifestyle, and reach all my goals. Beginning January 5, I will be moving schools, and that is the day I have chosen to start my transformation. My first goal is to keep this blog for one year, showing my changes in the year 2009. I will make a list of my many goals on the sidebar here. I play 2 main sports right now, Baseball and Football. And I am beginning Track and Wrestling in 2009 at my new school. Some of my favorite hobbies are heated Yoga, Weight Lifting, playing ping pong, pick up basketball and reading inspirational books such as Malcolm Gladwell's "Outliers", which is my favorite book. 

The reason I am keeping a blog is this, my life has been in a constant cycle of slacking grades, slacking sleep, slacking workout schedules, and slacking eating habits. I am sick of TOLERATING my life, I want something better than what I have, and this blog will keep my journey open and updated.